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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28524501">gunshot</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/goldentongues/pseuds/goldentongues'>goldentongues</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Haikyuu!!</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Aftermath of Torture, Angst, Gen, Gun Violence, Mafia AU, Murder-Suicide, Suicide, Torture, haikyuu mafia au, hq mafia au, it's painful, sorry in advance, sorry u guys, suga is a mean asshole, tsukki is heartbroken and goes feral, yams is trying</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-03</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-03</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 20:48:57</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,198</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28524501</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/goldentongues/pseuds/goldentongues</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>you tried your best not to get caught, you really did. now he’s reaping what you sowed.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Tsukishima Kei/Reader</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>26</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>gunshot</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>cross-posted from my tumblr @ichorizaki</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Tsukishima Kei knew that it was you all along. He knew that it was you who infiltrated the mafia under the guise of a new recruit with the tech department, and yet he fell for you. He knew that it was you. You promised him that you wouldn’t get caught—that you were going to triple-cross instead and turn your back against the network you came from, against your employer who was nothing but a shadow and an auto-tuned voice. He knew that you wanted to come clean, to formally join as a recruit loyal to the mafia and only the mafia, so you could both be together without sneaking around like high school kids anymore.</p><p>So why were you on your knees before him, arms bound behind your back with thick rope? Why were you in a torture room meant for infiltrators, trespassers, and traitors? Why were you battered and bruised, wounds fresh and old littering your skin where it was exposed from the tears of your clothes? Why were your knees red as were your right cheek, tears streaming down your face and sweat lining your forehead? Dirt and grime on your shoulders, neck, face?</p><p>Why in the absolute fucking <em> hell </em> were you the one he was pointing the barrel of his fully loaded gun to?</p><p>“<em>Kei</em>.” Why was his voice so sickening? His voice was so sweet that it <em> revolted </em> him. He was never on the frontline of action. He had always sat back, being part of the team that was the watchful eye or the mastermind behind operations, never once touching his loaded gun. He had sworn to only point his gun when needed. Everyone knew this. Everyone, including Sugawara Koshi himself. “What are you waiting for?” He hummed, blithe in the way he stalked to his side with his hands behind his back.</p><p>He was a foot taller than Sugawara, but the man’s presence alone was enough to make someone as tall as he is to cower. Kei clenched his teeth, jaw tense, and never once took his eyes off of you. The thick braided rope was caught in between your teeth, a grimy mix of sweat, blood, tears, and saliva bleeding into the material. You were shaking your head, words muffled.</p><p>“Shut the fuck up, you fucking <em> traitor</em>.” Kei didn’t need to look at Sugawara to know that he was glaring at you like you were the scum of the Earth. The way his voice dropped and was fuelled with hatred burning so strongly nearly stunned him into thinking he’d gotten scalded by his words alone. Kei swallowed his saliva. His lips were dry and hot, peeling at the end as he pursed them together once again. “C’mon, Kei. Just pull the trigger. You said you’d never use it unless it was <em> absolutely necessary</em>, right, Kei?”</p><p>No. He wanted to shake his head no. This was not a necessity. There could have been another way—there’s <em> always </em> another way. Fuck, he just wanted to get you out alive. He didn’t want you to suffer like this. He didn’t mean for you to get caught. How did you even get caught in the first place? You told him you wouldn’t get caught—you <em> promised </em> him.</p><p>“What’s the hold up, <em> Kei</em>?” Never had he hated their leader like this before. All this while, he’s been the one laughing at the sidelines, mocking and taunting these traitors and anyone who thought they were strong enough to take on a whole mafia clan on their own. “That bitch is a traitor. Why are you taking so long? I’ve got a meeting with Oikawa-kun in fifteen minutes.”</p><p>Now that it was him in that position, he didn’t know what to say. What <em> could </em> he even say? That he was in love with you? That you both love each other? Love was nothing but a ruse or a bait to Sugawara—a <em> weapon</em>, even, that he liberally uses to get what he wants. Your whimpers and cries, muffled by the rope burning into the skin and edges of your lips, was what caught his attention. His arm was getting tired from holding the heavy gun in your direction. You were merely six feet apart from him. He didn’t even have the strength to place his finger close to the trigger. His index finger hovered over it, the weight of what could have been you and him and a happy ending sitting on his chest like a thundercloud that’s heavier than the world.</p><p>The him before meeting you would’ve scoffed at him for even thinking about a happy ending. He knew who he was—or is?—a crime syndicate member with a penchant for helping the community whilst thirsting for the blood of those so-called righteous fuckers. It was the main reason why he joined the Miyagi clan after all, and it was also your reason for being part of a web of networks with assassins and political leaders alike.</p><p>“<em>Kei</em>,” he called for him in a sing-song voice. “Why won’t you pull the trigger? Do I need to make Tadashi, do it?”</p><p>“<em>No</em>! Fuck, <em> not </em> Yamaguchi.”</p><p>“Then <em> what’s </em> the hold up? He’s right outside the door, you know.”</p><p><em> Fuck you</em>, is what he wanted to say. <em> Fuck you, leave me and Y/N be before I lose my shit. </em></p><p>Thorns of guilt wrapped around his throat like a vice when his eyes met yours once again, pleading and begging for him to pull the trigger. Your voice was muffled but he knew what you were chanting over and over again. He just chose to ignore it. He refused to acknowledge that you were begging for him to end it then and there, to end your suffering and his, but he knew damn well that it would be prolonged. He knew all too well that he’d suffer for as long as you were with him, and oh, how he <em> hated </em> himself for coming to terms with that.</p><p>“Look, they’re begging for you to shoot them, Kei.”</p><p>No.</p><p>“It’s just one pull, Kei. That’s all it takes.”</p><p><em> No</em>.</p><p>He swallowed his saliva once again. He couldn’t bring himself to pull the trigger. He just couldn’t. Not after spending time with you. Not after learning who you were, not after learning that you were supposed to infiltrate the Miyagi clan to take out Sugawara so that the clan would crumble without one of its three heads and refusing to go through with what you were hired to do because you found out that the clan was actually helping the underprivileged in the state. Not after learning that he loves you.</p><p>Kei heard Sugawara’s footsteps walk further from him and towards the door. He heard it click open as he stepped outside, footsteps down the hall and when he was sure that he was no longer there, the poor man sunk to his knees. The tears that he tried so hard to keep at bay spilled down his cheeks, arms going limp as the pistol was placed on the floor, barrel aimed away from you so you wouldn’t get hurt anymore. He couldn’t do it. His shoulders slumped forward, his body shaking and trembling as sobs broke from his dry throat. His hand moved to cover his mouth, lips quivering and glasses fogging from the hot tears when he looked up at you, shaking your head with more tears of your own running down your tear-stained cheeks, mixing with the grime, sweat and blood.</p><p>“It’s okay,” you told him. “I’ll be okay, baby.”</p><p>He refused to listen to that. No, it wasn’t going to be okay. It wasn’t going to be okay, not when your life was on the line. He found himself shaking his head, refusing to listen to your words as he wiped his tears away with the back of his wrist.</p><p>“I love you, Y/N.” He all but croaked it out to you. “I love you so fucking much, I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry, Y/N, I swear. Fuck, I’m so– I’m so sorry.”</p><p>“Kei, I love you too. Please– Please don’t cry.”</p><p>At that point, both of you were on your knees, sobbing and wishing things were just the slightest bit different. He couldn’t stop apologizing a thousand times and a little bit more, neither could you stop telling him that you love him and that everything would be okay even though you both knew it wouldn’t be. His mind was filled with too many thoughts running around, looping and tangling with one another until it was one convoluted mess. He couldn’t think. He didn’t even notice Sugawara had returned to the room until he felt someone grab his chin to lift his head.</p><p>“Kei,” Sugawara’s voice was but thinly veiled impatience. It sent chills running down his spine as he was forced to watch you. His cold hands were strong and tight on his jaw, ordering him to keep his eyes on you and nowhere else. “Tadashi-kun, if you’d please.”</p><p>Wait, <em> what</em>?</p><p>Before Kei could even comprehend what was going on, he heard the click of the safety lock before the ear-splitting <em> bang! </em> It all happened too quickly. He tasted gunpowder on his tongue before he heard another shot as your body went limp and fell to the floor in slow motion. There was a ringing in his ears from the glaringly loud shots, but he didn’t care if he’d gone half-deaf.</p><p>The second that Sugawara’s hand left his jaw, he rushed to his knees and swiveled around, feeling his heart beat a rhythm he never quite listened to before. It was rash, abrasive, and he found himself grabbing the only person he could truly call his brother by the collar and shoving him against the wall. He was seething, burning, aflame with anger, but he couldn’t bring it upon himself to even say a word to him.</p><p>Both their eyes met and he dropped Yamaguchi. He didn’t care about the two remaining men in the room. He rushed to your dead body, a fresh gun wound square in the middle of your forehead with the bullet embedded deep inside. He wanted to cry more, but he couldn’t. Or was he? The tears were falling onto your lifeless face like paint-splattered rain, smudging the blood and dirt.</p><p>“That wasn’t so hard now, was it?”</p><p>Kei gently pulled you into his arms, holding you for one last time. His hand caressed your face, red staining his hands and smearing your hair where his fingers carded through your locks gently. He was just deathly quiet and he knew that their leader was unnerved by it, as well as his best friend, just that the former was better at hiding it.</p><p>“Now, now,” Sugawara sighed. “I better leave now if I don’t want to be late for my meeting with Oikawa-kun. Tadashi-kun, don’t forget to call in the cleaning team to clear the room!” Of course he was so cavalier about it. He didn’t expect any less from the silver-haired leader who led the mafia with an iron fist, the glue that ties the three leaders together so the clan could run as it should.</p><p>“Yes, sir.”</p><p>Even with your lifeless body he was so careful. He tenderly lifted your body off of his lap, settled you down on the cold cement floor before slowly rising to his feet. He could tell that Yamaguchi’s eyes were on him, watching his every move. He knew he was turbulent; dangerous, even. Yamaguchi knew how much you meant to him. So what in the goddamn fuck did Sugawara offer him to use his stupid skills to take your life?</p><p>“You know it’s for the best, K–”</p><p>“No the <em> fuck </em> it’s not, Yamaguchi.”</p><p>Both of them were staring at each other, a barren stillness in the dead of his golden eyes. It was silent. Neither of them moved a muscle. Kei blinked ever so slowly as his eyes traveled to the gun that sat on the floor where he knelt earlier. It was probably a bad idea. An unamused chuckle left his lips.</p><p>“Kei, what are you . . .” Yamaguchi’s voice died in his throat the second he realized that Kei was reaching for the gun. What was he going to do now? If he was going to try and shoot him, he knew that he could easily throw the gun out of his hand. Kei lacked in what he excelled at.</p><p>The metal felt so cool and smooth against the roughness of his calloused palm. He let the weight sit on his hand, eyes admiring every detail of the sleek gun. He didn’t even know what model it was. All that he knew was it was for shooting others and it wasn’t in his book to do so regardless of how adequately skilled of a marksman he was. His name was but the ghost of a whisper on Yamaguchi’s lips as he heard the safety click undone, barrel pointed to the side of his head.</p><p>What you said was probably true. Things were going to be alright. Things were going to be alright as long as he pulled the trigger.</p><p>So he did.</p>
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